The sound of rain splattering into the ground was like that dreaded voice that won’t stop. A voice that reminds me of all the things I want to block out with theses futile things called walls.
The rain pounds on, the war cry of an oncoming typhoon that refuses to stray from its path. The storm outside was like the rage of emotions that has escaped through me, leaving myself hollow like the room that shelters me.
It is moments like these, with the chaos of things beyond your control, that you realise how alone you really are. It is moments like these, that isolate you in time and space, making you reflect on all the choices you have made that lead to where you are.
It is moments like these, when doubt becomes a monster much more horrifying than the one raging outside.
When you make the decision to leave the warmth of home in order to test your limits, you are bound to face hard times. During these times, the emotions of grief and fear overwhelms you like an icy grip on your burning heart. Like the juxtaposition of the ravaging typhoon with the emptiness of my room.
Then the familiar ring of my phone distracts me, scattering away my anxiety for a fleeting moment as I look at the screen.
And what I saw were tulips wearing the veil of sunrays as they eagerly embraced the signs of full bloom.
家裡的鬱金香盛開了
(The tulips at home are blooming)
That was the message that followed. The simple words from my dad harbouring a power that rekindled a warmth in my cold body thousands of kilometres away.
Despite the cold and seemingly endless typhoon, on the other side of the world, spring has arrived with the welcoming bloom of tulips. These are tulips that have gone through the bitter long winter, clinging to the prospect of a spring…and survived.
It was as though this simple message was telling me that no matter how hard the storm blows in life, it will eventually pass and spring will come. It was as though to remind me, that there will always be a home ready for me no matter what happens. A home where tulips grow.
And as though spring had arrived within me, I felt the ice in my heart melt and the colours of my room return. The typhoon raged on, but already, I can see the tulips blooming on the other side of the storm.